


End of Everything

by arin_arryn



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Cersei and Dany were probably dead already at this point, F/M, I don't hate Jaime, I don't know why I wrote this, I just thought Jaimsa was hopeless at this point, Implied political!Jon, Jaime POV, Mentioned daenerys, Please Don't Hate Me, after season 7 and after the Great War, but not reallly, especially when there are other ship like Jonsa and Braime, my endgame is jonsa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-20 12:59:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14261496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arin_arryn/pseuds/arin_arryn
Summary: He managed to avoid her for three nights, but he knew that this day would come eventually. You can’t escape the Queen in the North in her own home, it doesn’t matter whether you try to hide in a cave or in a castle, she would find you anywhere.He was standing near the weirwood tree when she found him, the last place anybody would ever find him. But she wasn’t just anybody, so it shouldn’t surprised him when he heard her sweet voice calling his name.“Jaime”





	End of Everything

**Author's Note:**

> Please read the tags.

He managed to avoid her for three nights, but he knew that this day would come eventually. You can’t escape the Queen in the North in her own home, it doesn’t matter whether you try to hide in a cave or in a castle, she would find you anywhere.

He was standing near the weirwood tree when she found him, the last place anybody would ever find him. But she wasn’t just anybody, so it shouldn’t surprised him when he heard her sweet voice calling his name.  

“Jaime”

She was standing so far from him. Her voice was so soft and yet it pierced him like a dagger. He refused to look at her face, he can not look at her face when he said these word. “I can’t believe it. Even after what he did to you?”

She took a  few step closer to him, her chains were clinking as she move. Now he could smell her scent, it was a mixed of lemon and rose oil. She used to smell like lavender, until he told her that it remind him with Cersei. Now he can't remember anything else but her. “He didn’t do anything to me. He did what he had to do.”

“Right. Jon Snow can’t do anything wrong, he was just lie to you  and make a mess out of everything, and still, you choose him over me.” He was hurt, deeply, yet he can not stopped his eyes from looking at her. She clasped her hand to try to keep herself calm. Or she probably tried to restraint herself from run and hug him close to her, just like she used to do before, every time she was in distress.

_Man can hope._

She took another step again. Now there is nothing to see but her, nothing to smell but her, nothing to feel but her. She cautiously touched his good hand with her gloved one. It wasn’t enough, he want to take her gloves off and touch her skin, but he couldn’t move. Froze by her haunted look. Those clear blue eyes, once filled with passion and happiness, now filled with pity and despair.

“I didn’t choose him over you. How can I choose something that’s never been a choice in the first place?”

He took a step back and then turn his back on her. He didn’t want her to see him cry. He can’t even remember the last time he cry. Was he mourning for his father? For his children? For Cersei? The sadness he felt was overwhelmed him, he want to run from her, but he couldn’t. She was like gravity, keep pulling him back and making him fall over and over again. He didn’t know what else there is to say, except what he feels for her now. He turn to looked at her to find that she was crying too. He cupped her cheek as he wiped her tears. “I love you, Sansa. I know I’m less worthy than him, in fact I know I’m not worthy of you at all. But I love you, truly.”

She lean on his touch and for a brief moment he was dare to hope. “It’s not because you less worthy than him. It’s because he’s Jon. It doesn’t matter If I had to choose between you or jon, or If I had to choose between the crown or Jon, or if I had to choose between my life or Jon. I will always choose Jon.”

He took his hand back from her face. He know it was too good to be true. Those months he spend with her were feels like a dream. He want to yell at her, told her that he was there for her when her precious Jon go playing lover to his Dragon Queen, but he couldn’t, it would crushed her heart, and that’s the last thing he want to do.

“I know I can not give you what you want. I can not marry you or give you children unless you wanted a Lannister bastard running around in winterfell sacred ground. But I keep you safe, I made you happy. Isn’t that enough?”

He didn’t need her answer. Jon could keep her safe and happy, and more. He could give her a true Stark heir. Uniting the North and bring peace and prosperity with their union. He smiled as he realized that his life was joke, played by a cruel god. The only god they have.

“Gods wasn’t done with me yet. I crippled your brother, they took my sword hand. I wasting my life falling in love with my sister, They make me in love with a woman that love her brother.”

She averting her eyes to look at her feet. “He is not my brother”

“Doesn’t it matter when he was in love with you when he was still your brother?” He might be the stupidest Lannister, but he can see how Jon looking at her longingly, for he’d been looking at Cersei long before him. He heard how Jon couldn’t take a slightest joke about her marriage with Tyrion, or how he look at her possessively every time any men neared her. He dared once again to look at her face only to find that she wasn’t surprised with his word. She knew that Jon already in love with her when she was still his half-sister.

Could she..? No. There is no point to ask if she felt the same back then. It would just going killed him. And yet, he couldn’t stop his mouth for saying this word to her. “Of course it doesn’t matter. But you already knew it didn’t you? You already in love with him, even when you were still with me.”

Her stoic mask was completely off now. She was sobbing, her whole body was shaking as her clear blue eyes turn into red, brimming with tears. “Jaime...”

He knew what she was about to say. He’s not going to let her say it. It would be final and he wasn’t ready to end everything with her. “Don’t. Don’t you dare to say those words to me, Sansa.”

She closed her mouth for a moment, holding her words in her lips just for a while, until she open her mouth again.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

She was running away from him and back to Jon. She leave him standing here surrounded by her scent and her memory. He tried so hard to hate her, it would be easier that way. He already hate this place, he hate how the snow covering the ground, how the leaves remind him of her hair, how he always feel like he didn’t belong in here, but he couldn’t hate her. She deserve all the happiness in the world as he deserve all the pain in the world.

He looking back to the castle he used to despise so much. It was almost a ruin after it burnt twice and yet she managed to built it up again, almost to its former glory.

_It was not just her, they built it together._

He was in the crossroads between up north and the south, and he realized that there is no chance for him to ever fall in love again. He deserved to bear this pain forever. People might argue that it was Littlefinger that caused mayhem between the Stark and the Lannister, but all of it wouldn’t happen if he didn’t fall in love with his own sister, wouldn’t happen if their foul relationship never spawned a demon named Joffrey, and it wouldn’t happen if their love didn’t make him almost killed an innocent boy. There is only one place to go. The only place where he surrounded with another sinner like him. If he couldn’t spend his life with her, let him gave his life to protect the realm for her, for she is his last chance of honor.

**-.-**

_“_ _Let me thank you ahead of time for guarding us all from the perils beyond the Wall - wildlings and_ _white_ _walkers and whatnot._ _We're grateful to have good, strong men like you protecting us._ _”_

_..._

_“_ _We've guarded the Kingdoms for 8,000 years._ _”_

_..._

_“_ _ls it "we" already? Have you taken your vows, then? Soon enough._ _Give my regards to the Night's Watch._ _l'm sure it will be thrilling to serve in such an elite force._ _”_

 _“_ _And if not_ _..._ _it's only for life._ _”_

 

**Author's Note:**

> Epilogue: Jaime would serve the Night Watch and elected as the 1000 Lord Commander. Sansa and Jon married, with Jon finally become a Stark (or they completely making a new house combining Stark and Targaryen, idk). They have 5 children and they live happily ever after in my world. The End  
> Thank you so much for reading. xxoo


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